Read Funny Comedy Jokes Article 2

Read Funny Comedy Jokes Article 2

 

 

 

: BREAKING NEWS

BUHARI HANDS OVER POWER TO OSINBAJO.

It has been confirmed by CNN this morning that the President of the federal republic of Nigeria Muhammadu Buhari has handed over power to his Vice, Prof. Yemi Osinbajo at the early hours of this morning at London where the President is currently resting. 

This decision came after a close door meeting held by the cabals and chieftains of the APC.

According to the media adviser to Buhari, Mr. Femi Adesina, President Buhari handed over his 50,000mAh power bank to Osinbajo to enable him charge his phone whose battery is down as a result of lack of electricity in Nigeria!

Thanks for reading.

comman beat me if you vex, lolzzz

 


 

 

A man caught a thief at night in his kitchen. Just when the man was going to raise the alarm,the thief said:"Do you remember what I said in the Bible?I said "I will come like a thief in the night"."I have come again. Blessed are you among men that you have stayed awake as I told you." Then the man looked at the thief, smiled and replied, "Sir, you have fallen into the hands of Pontius Pilate again!"* I will nail u today!

 

 

 Musa came back from school singing DANMALIYO MALIYO and dancing it. His father was wondering why he was so happy and decided to ask him.

DAD: My son, I have never seen you in this mood in a long while. Any good news to share?

MUSA: Dad, next year you wouldn't be buying any textbook, or any study material.

DAD: That's my boy. Did you win a scholarship?

MUSA: No! I'm repeating the same class again.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 The real meaning of "I am finished" is when you close the door to kill a snake in ur room

and NEPA takes the light ,..

My dear the devil is using your life to test their new version of TEMPLE RUN. 

 

 JEALOUS HUSBAND*

HUSBAND: Where are you?

WIFE: At home love.

HUSBAND: Are you sure?

WIFE: Yes.

HUSBAND: Turn on the blender.

WIFE: (turns blender on) reeereeeereeee

HUSBAND: Ok my love goodbye.

*Another day*

HUSBAND: My wife where are you?

WIFE: At home love

HUSBAND: Are you sure?

WIFE: Yes

HUSBAND: Turn on the blender

WIFE: (turns blender on) reeereeeereeee

HUSBAND: Ok my love goodbye

The next day, the husband decides to go home without

notice, and finds his son alone and he asked him; son where

is your mother?

SON: I don't know, she went out with the blender."

 

 

 

 

 

: Can't stop laughing 

 

Why we must not lie to impress someone.

 

Today I was coming back from

work in the bus there sat a very pretty girl. All the guys in the bus were staring at her. 

Many of them passed their destination without knowing, as for me I was very proud of myself because I sat next to her. 

 

I did all the signs I could to make her feel my presence but all in vain. 

 

An idea came to my mind. 

I took my phone and dialed a fake number as guys always do to attract girls' attention.

 

Me: Hello Mum, pls I'm calling to remind u that I can't make it today because I just received a call from the Lagos State Governor asking me to replace him at the meeting bcoz he is not in Nigeria now. Pls tell my brother to use my Range Rover 2017 to come and pick you up from the market. I will be at home in 2days. Thanks Mum. I will Mum. Love u too. 

 

All this while the girl was looking at me, I said in my heart that she will fall for me if I talk to her ..

Me: Hi baby, why are you looking at me like that? Are you surprised?

 

Girl: Pls collect ur phone battery. It fell down when u were removing it from your pocket.....???? 

 

I couldn't raise my head till I got down from the bus.

 

 

 

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